Thursday, November 11, 2010

Promises

This piece is inspired by The Red Dress Club to write about this picture from Easy Street Prompts:


The two friends, Josie and Sarah, walked into the bar, feeling comfort in its darkness. It was a familiar place to the girls – a favorite haunt. The music from the jukebox was mixed with edgy, alternative rock and classic rock. Sometimes a band played, but not that night. The ceiling was low and there were many little rooms and spaces – corners to hide in if that’s what you wanted. Before heading to their favorite room, the pool table room, where most of the guys were, they approached the bar for their first shot and a drink. Getting to a certain level of non-feeling was first on the list.

As soon as the edges were dulled just a little bit, they walked into the pool room, looking for friends, looking for attention, looking for some fun. They saw some people they knew, joined their group, and began talking and laughing, intentionally acting in a way to liven up the party.

Josie scanned the room, always looking and waiting for the next thing, when her eyes came upon an old woman she had seen before.

“That old woman looks like she’s been ridden hard and put away wet a few too many times!” the guy next to Josie shouted in her ear.

Josie smiled, giving the guy approval, but inside she thought, What the fuck is that supposed to mean, you idiot?

The old woman sat away from the crowd at a table by herself. Her long gray hair lay across her back in thick strings. She was overweight and a bit…dirty…weathered…it was hard to tell but easy to assume she hadn’t seen a shower in a while.

Every time Josie saw the old woman, always in different bars in the little town, she had a deck of tarot cards with her. She gave readings to people for tips, Josie assumed, but she hardly ever saw anyone sitting with her. The old woman usually sat alone, feeling her cards, turning them over, looking at them.

“What’r’ye gon’ do, go get a reading?!” another guy asked Josie, close enough to give Josie a whiff of his breath.

Josie didn’t say a word and just started walking over to the old woman. She had always been intrigued about psychic readings, surely not every self-proclaimed psychic was a kook? She was a little scared by the information she could be given – would she have a fatal illness, would she always be lonely, would she never make anything of herself at all? And the worst fear - would all her dark secrets be exposed? Would she stand before the supposedly all-knowing person hot with shame and be judged for the sins of her past?

Well, this night, she had had enough to drink to not care. She felt no fear. She wanted to test this old woman out. Find out about her future. What dreams could be attained? What promises could be made?

“She’s going to tell you that you’ll DIE TONIGHT in a horrible car wreck,” screamed one of the guys behind Josie. “Don’t do it, Josie, you don’t want to hear THE TRUTH! Bwa, HA, HA, HA, HA!!” The idiot continued.

Josie approached the table and sat down. The old woman looked up at her and smiled.

25 comments:

cristina said...

and????? what does she tell her? you are such a tease, lol

Write Chick said...

Your writing never ceases to amaze me. I'm dying to hear what the old lady says!

jazzygal said...

Wow... you SO have to write that book !
Fab.. well done.

xx Jazzy

blueviolet said...

I want to know what the lady tells her!

Jen said...

I just loved this story. :)

Tenille said...

Does the old lady tell her to smack the idiot about the forehead?

:-)

Ratz said...

Oh No... don't do this Kristy.. You are teasing us with suspense... not fair! :-(

Mrs. MidAtlantic said...

Ah! Love how you ended right when she sits down with the old lady!

The Drama Mama said...

You have captured the idiots perfectly, and I'm really loving Josie. I want to know more too.

Cheryl said...

Okay, this story totally made me miss being young and going to the bars. You painted a very realistic picture and of course left us wanting to know more - about Josie AND the woman.

Kim said...

I liked this take on the prompt. Fun and contemporary.

Jackie said...

And.... what happens next???? Does she get the reading? Does the old lady tell her something she doesn't want to hear or does she paint a picture of a perfect future?

Nichole said...

You have made me breathe a huge sigh of relief that those bar days, looking for Mr. Right, are far behind me. Shudder! Great description!
And, like everyone else, I'm curious about Josie's reading.

Amanda said...

I love how you came up with a bar scene from this picture! I haven't been to all of the other red dress club writers, yet, but I'm guessing you're the only one to go this route.

Looks like you'll have to write a follow-up piece to satisfy the rabble's curiosity~

(Florida) Girl said...

I def. felt irked by the obnoxious guy characters here and the unsavory bar scene in general. Good job setting the scene.

NappyDaze said...

Nice way to plant a seed of intrigue - love your style!!

TV's Take said...

You have a gift!!! Love it, now I pretty much need to know what happens next!

Carrie said...

Okay...so now you have to tell us what she said!!!

Oh, and I hope it involves those guys getting a smack up the head. What a$$holes

ksluiter said...

wow! i was right there in that bar. I could smell it and see it and hear it...and remember it. and your characters? wow again! I so very much want to know what the cards say...

cornflakegirl74 said...

COME ON...I want to know what happens next! But what a way to reel in your readers!

Fantastic story-telling and very interesting character development. You clearly have a knack for writing. Well done and I'm very happy to have stopped by today!

I wanted to thank you so much for stopping by on my SITS day and for leaving me a comment so I could find you today. Hope you're enjoying your weekend :)

cutefatgirl said...

You always leave me wanting more. Write more!

kathryn said...

UGH. You are unbelievably MEAN....just leaving us hanging like that. You should be ashamed. Hang your head, sweetie. Grrrrr.

Young Wife said...

What a great story!

Shell said...

And then what??

Amy said...

Ahhhh, I want more!!!

Your description of that bar reminded me of my old college hangout with my roomate. Every detail you wrote could have been any one of our nights from the years of 1998-2001:) Made me smile.