Thursday, April 22, 2010

How Many Times Can I Say Bliss?


Yesterday, I had a day all to myself. Talk about restorative. I was totally blissed out. I had been feeling run down and was feeling a cold coming on. If I didn’t get rest, I was feeling like I would succumb to a full-blown cold or a full-blown anxiety attack. I also knew my husband was leaving on a trip, and I would be a single, working mother for a few days (By the way, how do single mothers do it, anyway?! God bless them.)

Well, yesterday, I got to be just me. I wasn’t a mother, I wasn’t a wife, I wasn’t a coworker. I was me.

When I have the rare opportunity for me time, I like to do. . . NOTHING. My husband likes to run a 5K, take a hike or grueling bike ride, and then socialize with a bunch of people. Uck. I want no one around me, I want no pressure to do anything, no physical strain or activity, and no questions. I choose to do very introvert-type things in order to feel the energy come back to my soul. I read, I write, I lay, I think, I watch movies, I eat – alone.

So, I took a day off work and had my husband take our son to daycare. I pushed all work and mothering guilt to the back of my mind and let the relief wash over me. And what is it with this guilt, anyway?! I haven’t been able to get rid of it since I became a Mom.

First, I slept in. An absolute must. Got a good 12 hours of sleep. When I woke, I got some coffee, grabbed the laptop, and promptly got back in bed. I turned on the TV, and I didn’t really care what was on, as long as all I heard were adult voices. You see, I work at an elementary school, so even when I am at work, most of what I heard are those precious little voices. My coffee was on my bedside table, my cat was purring next to me, and the laptop warmed my legs as I read blogs. Get this – God had even ordered up a cloudy, misty day for me just to add to that wonderful, cozy, all-alone-and-doing-whatever-I-want feeling.

Ah. Bliss. Heavenly bliss.

I got out of bed in order to eat lunch. I settled on the couch and watched a movie on Showtime. I was still in the horizontal position, only in a different room. You know, so I could say I didn’t spend all day in “bed.” I wanted to watch something with an intelligent plot, a little suspense, and cussing. Something I would never watch if Parker was around. I settled on The Gift (with Cate Blanchett, Keanu Reeves, and a naked Katie Holmes, oh my), and then Nurse Jackie. I love watching Nurse Jackie pop pills, cheat on her husband, and act surly at work – it is scandalous! Makes me feel so much better as a person.

When the clock neared 4:00, I felt a little frantic and thought, “I have about half an hour left! What should I do? What would be the perfect way to spend that time? Would I feel good about myself if I worked out? Should I clean something? Should I just lay here until time is up?” I decided to just take a hot, leisurely shower.

When my boys (the husband and the son) walked in, I greeted them with hugs and smiles and sat on the floor to play cars with Parker. I didn’t have to fake excitement or muster up the energy to play cars. I happily played for a little bit before it was time to make dinner. I felt so much better and no longer run down. Some totally blissed out me time was all it took. I found myself again for a time that day and was able to better connect with my family.

What do you do to restore yourself? What do you consider blissful “me” time? If you had a day to yourself, what would you do with it?

14 comments:

Lucy said...

It has been so so so long, I have forgotten what such unadulterated, or unchilderated bliss that would be.

But the next time I do get child free time: pedicure and manicure and shopping. And like you, no talking to anyone.

chele said...

I felt blissful just reading this. On my "me" days I grab a book and head out to the backyard swing with a glass of wine. Those "me" days are a definite must!

Visiting from SITS.

My Mercurial Nature said...

That sounds very relaxing! I like to spend alone time reading or blogging & facebooking (is so a word!), but tend to throw in a little running, too.

kbxmas said...

Oh, yay for you!! I think I would spend my day almost exactly the same way, only perhaps without the movies. I love sitting in bed with a cup of coffee and messing around on the computer. Pure bliss! Hmmm...sneaking out for a manicure in the afternoon might be nice too.

Mommy's Sippy Cup said...

Oh my goodness! 12 hours of sleep? I can only dream of 12 hours of sleep! So happy you got a break. And I am right there with you about just wanting to do nothing sometimes!

....Petty Witter said...

I saw your blog mentioned on Oddyoddyo's site where I awas also tagged so thought I'd pop by to hello and congratulations on your award. Nice to meet you, best wishes.

Oddyoddyo13 said...

Ugh. I honestly don't know how people actually move around when they have a day to themselves. Frankly, I wouldn't have gotten off the bed. Too much effort.

WarsawMommy said...

Oh... that sounds heavenly. I'd love a whole day alone, to do nothing but recharge and be surrounded by silence and peace.

I'm so glad you got such a blissful day - we all deserve one once in awhile. I hope to get mine some time in the next year ;)

Eva Gallant said...

I'm retired, my kids are grown and gone, but I still like a day to myself without hubby once in a while. And I spend it watching tv, reading blogs, and eating chocolate. Heavenly!
Just stopped by from SITS to say hi; hope you find time to do the same.

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babyandsofia said...

That sounds like a great day, and much needed, too. If I had a whole day to myself, I would probably go out for a mani/pedi and then go to the MOVIES. Then I would probably come home and take a nap on the sofa. Maybe I need to hire a sitter for a day....

Marketing Gurl said...

This sounds amazing..I found your blog through Mom's blog club and I am your newest follower! This is great...I love the name of your blog too. Happy Sunday. Love, MG

kathryn said...

Lovely, peaceful bliss.....heaven on earth! And here we thought they were full of crap when they said that WE needed to take care of ourselves to be better moms! Who would have thought they were right?

I try to find balance on my "off-days" between getting *something* done and being totally self-indulgent. I find that watching teevee totally wipes me out for the rest of the day.

Zeemaid said...

argh. I am so jealous. What I wouldn't give to spend a day like that. I pretty much do the same, sleep, read, write, watch a show. I'd also play a little Sims3. I've gotten a little hooked butI only get to play when hub works evenings, which was officially over last week. WAAH!