Sunday, April 18, 2010
I may believe that Supermom is a Myth, but I also believe that when a mom needs to, she gets the job done, no matter the daunting physical feat in front of her. Not only have I endured a 25 hour labor and the recovery thereafter, breastfeeding was excruciatingly, gnawingly painful (and it did not get better after two weeks like they tell you, I just started getting blisters). Then, it’s learning to do all tasks one-handed and on little to no sleep. From there we move on to becoming accustomed to holding a crying child down the street while pushing the empty apparatus the child no longer wants to sit in. And let’s not forget the lessons in back strengthening while taking your child in and out of car seats.
You get used to it. I handle other things on my own much better now as well. I have a braver face when I go to the doctor or dentist. I also truly wish that I could have all medical procedures done to me instead of my son to take his pain away.
I grew up hearing my own mother say, “Oh, honey, if I could get the shot for you, I would!”
When I was little, I figured she was lying. She was only saying that because it wasn’t possible and she just wanted me to feel better. Now I know that it was absolutely true. I would TOTALLY take that shot instead of my son so he could avoid the pain. That is why we’re mothers. We want to protect and take away the pain.
I surprised myself again today. I did something I don’t think I have ever really done before. I did it for my son. I climbed a fence. This is may not sound like a big deal, but this is extremely out of character for me. Usually, I am a HUGE WIMP. HUGE. WIMP. I am scared of heights, trying new machines at the gym gives me great anxiety, just watching rock climbing gives me toe cramps, and when my husband tries to take me on “easy” hikes I literally believe I am going to die.
Parker and I walked to the park. It took us a while to get there and we almost gave up a couple times and went back. Parker would get tired every so often and just sit on the side walk, but he would shriek if I tried to pick him up and carry him. We finally approached the fence of the park. Parker began jumping up and down holding onto the fence and shouting in excitement.
There was a family already inside playing on the equipment. The gate to get into the park was locked.
I yelled out to the family. “Is there an open gate, or did you have to climb the fence?!”
They yelled back, “We climbed the fence!”
I instantly felt deflated. The dad in the family looked big and strong. The mom looked tough and scrappy. The kids were older than my son.
I thought, “Uh-oh. I’m going to have to drag Parker away and . . .”
I looked down at Parker. I could not make him turn away. We had walked too far and overcome too many obstacles to turn away now. It was like when the Griswolds finally approached WallyWorld. And it was closed. You darkly realize that you will break laws to get your child in that park. I steeled myself.
I told myself, “I can do this. I never have before, but for crying out loud, I’m going to today.”
I couldn’t believe I had to do it in front of other people too. It wasn’t even a tall fence (and you know, I am like a giant, tall lady, so I really shouldn’t be so afraid, but my mind is much stronger than my body). I picked up Parker and got him over, and off he went running at top speed toward the playground. I put my toe inside one of the holes of the fence. The hole was too small. I was really going to have to grip it with my shoes. I felt a toe cramp coming on.
“No!” I pushed the thought out of my mind. I will not have a toe cramp, and I WILL get over this fence. I jumped up and got my waist parallel to the top of the fence, put a toe in, got one leg over top one at a time (completely ignoring the pain in the back of my thighs and crotch from sitting on the top of the fence), and jumped down. I DID IT. I CLIMBED over that damn fence. I ran to meet my boy and looked just like all the other accomplished, strong mommies on the other side of the fence.
And guess what? For our walk home, we found an opening in the fence on the other side of the park. Whew. Thank God. I may have done it once, but that was enough for today.