Thursday, July 21, 2011

Her Own Dreams

She had the place to herself. No TV, no sports announcer shouting at her, no boyfriend filling the space beyond capacity.

He thought she had a photography appointment while he was out. As if she needed something productive to be done if he wasn't around.

All she needed was the silence and the absence of him.

Soon, she would pour another glass of wine. Maybe she would grab a cigarette from her secret stash.

She heard the clicks getting faster, and her heart rate sped up for a moment. Then, the final Snap!

She got up to check the self portrait. Satisfied, she printed the image, happy with her idea to capture the moment. She grabbed a metal thumbtack, pressed it into the top of the picture into the wall above her bed. Lest she forget how good she felt at that moment. Grabbing a black Sharpie, she penned a title at the bottom of the picture:

Starting NOW.

Walking to the front door, she checked the locks again and picked up her phone from the side table. A text was all he deserved.

"I'm done. We're done. You cannot change my mind."

She turned her phone off, poured that glass of wine, and turned on the radio. Dancing, for the first time, without fear of pleasing anyone but herself.

This was a picture prompt for Red Writing Hood at The Red Dress Club, inspired by the image above.


Carrie said...

Love the sense of freedom and independence. You keep your writing tight, very little excess.

Great job!

Cheryl said...

Really good flash fiction. I liked how she loved her own space and took it back.

Eva Gallant said...

I liked that very much. We all need our space!

Jen said...


angela said...

I loved this:

All she needed was the silence and the absence of him.

Great job capturing the need for independence! Your writing is tight and succinct, which went well with the message. She cut things off neatly.

Clipped Wings said...

Wow! I was blown away with this one. You've written it quite well.

Galit Breen said...

Wowsa! LOVE! I adore the freedom, the decisiveness, the strength! Go her!

That image of the self portrait & the sharpie? Brilliant!

M. Hicks said...

I really liked that. What I liked especially was the image of making sure that your locks were in place before your text was on it's way. With very few words, you showed the weight of your decision, and you also showed that although you had given your choice finality with your Sharpie, you knew it really wasn't "all done with."

I think it's hard sometimes when we end a relationship because although our decisions can be final, there's always a wrap up that goes way past the technical end.

Writerly Wanna Be said...

All she needed was the silence and absence of him.

That one line...speaks volumes.

I would love to see the photo she took.

Katie @ Chicken Noodle Gravy said...

This was so freeing!! Even reading it, I got an enormous sense of freedom and happiness for her. Good for her for doing something so brave and leaving someone who was poisonous in her life behind.

Great job on this of my favorites today.

Glen said...

Nice.Great to see you writing like this :-) Quality.

Except for the fact that she was well out of order dumping him like that. Frankly he was too good for her anyway, lazy bint, flopping about the house drinking when she was supposed to be at work photographing people.

He's well out of that one I tell you :-)

CDG @ Move Over Mary Poppins! said...

Tight. Concise. Emotionally present.
A text was more than he deserved.

Jennifer said...

I loved this line: no boyfriend filling the space beyond capacity.

It did a great job of showing us how suffocated she was. Good for her!

Nice detail with the text. Brutal, efficient, final.

Stephanie M said...


jazzygal said...

Love how you write:-)

xx Jazzy

WhisperingWriter said...

What a fantastic post! Great job.

Katie Gates said...

Excellent! You set the mood beautifully and drove it home with eloquent efficiency.

Theresa said...

Absence and wine. Perfection...

Newlymeds said...

Great post. Love your blog title!

Meagan said...

I loved that!

TV's Take said...

Love it! It's about time she kicked him out

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