Welcome to the Club (What’s the Secret Password?)

He will always be my baby.

There are things that you JUST DON’T understand until you are a mother. Mothers all over the world right now exclaim, “Amen, Sista!” It is a little annoying to me when women without children don’t get this. And it is extremely satisfying when said women end up having children. Isn’t it funny how sometimes we think, “Oh, man, I can’t wait for that girl to have a baby.”

I had this strange sense of being welcomed into a cult-like group when I had my baby. If I can be VERY honest, I will even admit that after I gave birth, I thought, “Why was everyone so excited when I got pregnant?! They have kids. They should have WARNED me!” Well, I will tell you why they were so excited – because it wasn’t them that time, and they were probably thinking, “Oh, man, I can’t wait for that girl to have a baby. Then she’ll KNOW.”

And what are the things that you KNOW when you become a mom? Here are a few:

-You have given up your rights to daily, basic hygiene care.
-You have given up your rights to privacy.
-You have given up your rights to choose what you do and when.
-You have given up the right to sleep when you want.
-You have given up the right to a carefree sex life.
-You have earned the right to say “Because I said so” whenever you want.
-You have earned the right to demand respect from your child for only one reason: your body MADE this human.
-You are much more grateful for your own mother.
-You discover what it is like to FALL completely IN LOVE with your child.
-You discover what it is like to feel saturated and consumed by one little being.
-You discover the limitless capacity to love.
-You feel a constant “pull” and bond to your child.
-You wonder how you are going to emotionally handle it when your child no longer wants as many hugs, kisses, or cuddles.
-You discover that no matter how much you yearn for a moment to yourself, once you have it, you think about or talk about your child a whole lot.

Did you notice that the above list started out a little…unenthusiastic…and then grew to include some of the most powerful feelings you can have in a lifetime? Yeah, kids are kind of like that. They do that to you. One moment, you’re staring at your child in fear thinking “Oh my god, he is a maniac, something is wrong with him!” The next moment, you are melting and aching and wanting your child, who will ALWAYS be your baby.